On gratefulness, awareness and luck
There is no denying that it’s been an incredibly rough stretch of months. It’s been a huge challenge in many ways — mentally, emotionally and otherwise.
I know that there are many who have had it far worse than I have. People who have suffered tremendous losses. People who are jobless, homeless, and perhaps hopeless. The economic downturn amplified by the pandemic has affected nearly everybody in one way or another. I know this. So thank you for indulging me as I share a few words about my recent experiences — words about gratefulness, kindness, determination, awareness and luck. …
For me and my family, things got all too real last March. That’s when my father’s cancer returned, bringing a brutal infection with it and suddenly landing him in the ER. Knowing that this could be it, my siblings and I came from around the country to Spokane to be with Dad and to support Mom. All of this was happening as the general public was becoming aware of the dangers of COVID-19. But despite this we had to go. So in early April, I drove from Los Angeles to Spokane and we stood vigil with Dad during his final days.
(Side note: I ended up doing a podcast about that experience with the wonderful folks at Ochenta Studio. You can listen here.)
While I was in Spokane — working remotely for my job with MSN.com — I found out that there had been layoffs. Two of my co-workers, and several others in other departments, were being shown the door. It turned out to be just the beginning. Our contracts were up at the end of June, and they needed to keep us engaged for a couple more months. So they waited until mid-May to tell the rest of us we would also be goners.
That was some bad luck, but as is my personality, I went to work, going all in on job hunting. I scoured the job boards, signed up for employment newsletters, reached out to contacts. I applied, applied, applied. The hunt became a full-time job itself.
Also at this time, I started producing a podcast series about my Dad. I had been looking for a topic for Season 3 of my show Razed Sports. Sports had been a big part of my Dad’s life, so why not? Besides, due to COVID we couldn’t have a funeral, so this was a way to honor him. I later joked with my brother that I had created the world’s longest eulogy.
But as I wrapped up the series in early November, I found that things were getting … difficult. The emotional toll of producing the podcast is hard to explain. On the one hand the experience brought me joy and love. But it was also heart-wrenching. I was emotionally spent but also sad that it was over. It’s true what they say: Grief is messy.
But the podcast was just part of it. At the same time, my job-hunting efforts were gaining little traction and the few leads I had failed to bear fruit. I was also tired of the sameness of being home every day. I was frustrated by what seemed like our collective weakness or indifference toward dealing with COVID in any kind of coordinated and productive way. I was exhausted by an election year marked by misinformation and divisiveness, and disheartened that it seemed to be so dang effective.
It all became a bit much. So to some extent I shut down. I stopped reaching out to friends. I stopped searching job boards. For a couple of weeks, I didn’t do much of anything. I just couldn’t shake it off.
Finally, I realized I needed to change things up. I needed a re-set. In a bit of inspiration, I remembered a book I had read awhile back. It was about Buddhism and was called ‘How to Transform Your Life: A Blissful Journey.’ I’m not a Buddhist, nor do I plan on becoming one. But I’m fascinated by some of their teachings and admire that they appear — at least to my limited knowledge — less prone toward violence than other organized religions.
So I re-read this book, and parts of it really spoke to me.
It talked about living in the moment — about being present.
It talked about not taking it personally when bad things happen to you — when someone does something that affects you in a negative way, it’s not really about you, but about the other person and how they are dealing with their own issues.
Then I came across one passage in particular that brought it all home:
This was the re-set I needed. I changed my focus. I reached out to friends. I looked for ways to help other people — even in small ways. I tried to push my focus outward, instead of wallowing in my own misfortune.
And as far as myself, I tweaked my plan a bit. Yes, I kept applying for journalism jobs, but I sought other options as well:
— I dove back into researching podcasts for my documentary network, Story Hangar.
— I explored the requirements for becoming a teacher in the Los Angeles School District and scheduled an assessment test to begin that process.
— I applied for a job with the United States Post Office, thinking I could use the health benefits and that being outside driving the truck around might be both fun and safer in a COVID world.
And what do you know … things started happening. I added three new podcasters to Story Hangar. I passed the LAUSD assessment test. I got hired by USPS and started training (and discovered that there is no group of people more dedicated and hard-working). And then …
… it happened … I got the call.
I was offered a job. In journalism. In sports. At a major national outlet. My luck had changed.
And so this week, I’m joining FOXSports.com as a Senior Editor. I’ll be working for Kevin Jackson — a creative force in the business who worked at ESPN for 25 years, creating Page 2, E-Ticket and many other initiatives. And I’m humbled to join a team that is diverse, ambitious and incredibly talented.
This is truly a wonderful opportunity and I am grateful beyond measure. I’m grateful that I was chosen from the pile in a market glutted with talent. I’m grateful for friends and colleagues who have offered their time, support, encouragement, kindness and connections over the last several months. I’m grateful for family members who have made it clear that I have what far too many do not — a generous and loving safety net. I am grateful for my wife, who never gave up on me, and for two kids who bring a special brand of joy and brilliance to every day. And I am grateful to my father, whose memory continues to share lessons and bring us together all these months after his passing.
And to my fellow journalists, I am both grateful for your inspiration and encourage you to keep going. If you’re currently out of work but truly love this business, keep searching, keep working, keep looking, keep grinding. A lot of you are working hard to build your own thing — through newsletters and podcasts and other avenues — and you’re succeeding. Keep going!
All I would say is if you’re grinding away for someone else, resist the urge to work for free, or for “clips” or “experience.” Insist on getting paid. Working for free doesn’t help any of us.
Also, keep an open mind to possibilities. There may be ways to stay in the biz that you or I haven’t envisioned. Everyone wants good content, and great storytelling will never go extinct. If you really want it, and you keep at it, you can make it happen, it just might not look exactly how you envisioned it. That can be a good thing.
This brings me to one more quote from a book that a friend of mine recently recommended. It’s called ‘The Biggest Bluff’ by Maria Konnikova. On the surface it’s a poker book, but that is an oversimplification. It’s really about human nature, about decision-making, about life — it’s about paying attention. Which brings me to this quote from the book, which has stuck with me during these past few weeks:
Pay attention. Be aware. The opportunities are out there. Sometimes you’re going to lose. That doesn’t mean the world is out to get you, or you’re not good enough, or someone is an idiot for not recognizing your greatness. It just means the cards didn’t fall in your favor this time. You just got unlucky.
But if you keep working hard and keep an open mind, if you keep communicating and keep being good to each other, things will change. The cards will fall your way. Because luck changes, and at some point — if you’re paying attention — you’ll recognize the opportunity when it does.
Thank you.
— Bob
P.S. Want to network? Please do! Find me on LinkedIn, or Twitter, or reach out through Story Hangar.
